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“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18, NIV).
I was nearing the end of my fifth year of teaching, but I could barely hold it together. For the last three years, I’d spent day after day at work followed by more work in a Master’s-level program. From sunrise to sunset, I’d teach, write, edit, and write some more.
In the mirror, I was becoming a hollow shell of myself. My eyes were fading, and I was a rope barely holding on. Most days, I was exhausted, and today, I was deteriorating. As I attended another ruthless Critique Call, I crumbled. That day, the feedback was too much.
As my weight hit the floor, my knees bent into a feeble position as I sobbed. I felt so heavy. So heavy that I didn’t know how I would go on. I was almost done teaching, but I was breaking. Doubts filled my mind:
Could I really leave my job?
Could I truly make it as an author?
Was I good enough?
That day, I realized that many of us feel the need to “be strong” or “keep it together” all the time. We feel like we can’t fall apart, not for a moment, and not even when we’re overwhelmed. We somehow convince ourselves that Jesus can’t see our mess. He shouldn’t see our mess. It’s far too embarrassing, right?
But friends, Jesus’ meeting us exactly where we are is what’s been promised to us—not where we pretend to be.
In Psalm 34:18, we read that our Heavenly Father is close to those who are broken and weary. Those who are tired and ready to give up. He’s closest not when we’re strong, but when we are shattered. Why? Because that’s when we learn to rely and depend on Him all the more.
Culture tells us to “just push through,” but if you listen for the stillness, the spiritual truth is that God is with us even here. You don’t have to or need to push through. You just need to come as you are, burdened, heavy, and weary.