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It’s been 6 months since I left teaching to pursue writing full-time. While most days are filled with adventure, suspense, cups of freshly brewed hot tea, and endless hours of new research ideas, others are lonely, chaotic, and stressful. Being an author is and isn’t what I expected—and maybe that’s a good thing.
On the hard days, I find myself thinking, “Why didn’t I stay with teaching? I had great benefits, good hours, and a wonderful staff. What if my books never sell? How will I care for my medical issues without insurance? What if something happens to my husband and his job?” The grass is always greener on the other side, right? But deep down, no matter how I try to reason it, I know that teaching wasn’t meant for me. It was a great job, but I wasn’t happy. It was stable, but I wasn’t fulfilled. It was a solid career, but it wasn’t God’s calling on my life. Writing, however, always has been and always will be.
In between doubts, waves of anxiety, pain, and nausea surround me. Clinical anxiety, depression, IBS-C, and Endometriosis will do that to you, to name a few. The 10+ physical and mental ailments assigned to me threaten to steal more than my purpose. They threaten to steal my identity, joy, and ambition. Can you relate?
No matter what circumstances you find yourself in today, I pray that these 2 reminders will help you rediscover biblical joy in tough and messy times. Not because recalling them mitigates your experiences, but helps us look beyond them.
