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“Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you” (Psalm 73:25, NIV).
Have you ever been in church and felt like the Pastor’s sermon was written just for you? Maybe your heart started pounding as your hands began to shake. And then, it’s your moment: The altar is open, and God is prompting you to respond, but you feel frozen. I know I have.
A few weeks ago, I heard a message about wanting God more than anything else. Wanting Him more than what He gives. And honestly, it was heavily convicting. All my life, I’ve been a striver and high achiever. Grades, volunteering, careers, you name it. For the last few years, I’ve been on a journey to traditionally publish my first book. But throughout all of this, I’ve had to keep one question center: Do I want God for who He is, or for what He can give me?
The quiet shift from wanting blessings to wanting God isn’t easy. Think about it. Most of our prayers are filled with requests and little praise. And God invites us to “pray without ceasing.” It’s okay to present our requests and needs. But what if God stripped everything back? What if God alone became enough?
In Psalm 73, we read about Asaph’s struggle with comparison. He’s frustrated with seeing the wicked succeed and live easy lives. He even goes as far as to envy them because here on earth, they seem to prosper and win. I know it’s easy to feel this way!
And yet, after he expresses his concerns to God, he’s able to shift from envy to clarity. He says, “they seem to live such painless lives; their bodies are so healthy and strong” (vs.4), but “then I realized that my heart was bitter, and I was all torn up inside” (vs.21). Do you and I have this kind of self-awareness? For “you guide me with your counsel, leading me to a glorious destiny. Whom have I in heaven but you? I desire you more than anything on earth” (vs.25). How was Asaph able to make this shift?
If we’re honest, most of us struggle with this internal conflict. We say we want God, but often want comfort, healing, and answers more. That doesn’t make us bad; it makes us human. However, the danger is this: treating God like a means, not the end, will always end in destruction and apathy.
When God becomes the desire, however, we encounter a beautiful turning point like Asap. We learn that it’s possible to encounter peace without answers. We can live for closeness rather than control. We surrender instead of continuing to strive. And God doesn’t shame our desires, rather He redirects them.
The day I heard this sermon at my church, I made my way to the altar. I was nervous, but I knew it was the right thing to do. On hands and knees, I laid it down. The desires. The dreams. The unanswered prayers. Because there were so many things I’d been chasing in this life. Chasing with no means to an end. But at the end of the day, I just wanted to desire God more than anything else. And friends, I desperately want that for you, too. Not because it’s painless or easy. Not because your desires are bad. But because He’s greater than anything we could ever want.