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“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans” (Romans 8:26, NIV).
It had been one of the most exhausting weeks of my life. After numerous book proposal rejections, challenging life circumstances, mental health struggles, and conflict, I found myself crying behind the steering wheel of my car. I tried to compose myself for my appointment, but the weight was too much. A deep groan erupted from within, and all I could do was stare.
Tears seeped down hollow spaces as I sat in silence, unable to form a sentence or thought. God was with me, but I couldn’t process His presence. I knew He heard my cries, but it didn’t feel like it. I wondered if things would ever get better. And if you’ve ever been there, you know the ache of wanting to pray but feeling like you don’t even have the words.
The good news? Prayer isn’t about perfect words, but the condition of my heart. In that moment, my heart was broken. Honestly, I was a bit embarrassed to bring it to the Lord in its messy state. But God isn’t impressed by the eloquence of our hearts—He desires honesty. This is why Hosea 6:6 and 1 Samuel 15:22 essentially say: “For I desire mercy, not sacrifice and acknowledgment of God rather than burnt offerings” (NIV).
In 1 Samuel 1, Hannah prayed in her heart for something she’d always desired. Those around her even thought she was drunk because her prayers were so distressing. You couldn’t hear a single word. But though the words were hard to form, and others judged her, God saw her, heard her, and honored the integrity of her heart:
“As she kept on praying to the Lord, Eli observed her mouth. Hannah was praying in her heart, and her lips were moving but her voice was not heard. Eli thought she was drunk and said to her, “How long are you going to stay drunk? Put away your wine.” “Not so, my lord,” Hannah replied, “I am a woman who is deeply troubled. I have not been drinking wine or beer; I was pouring out my soul to the Lord. Do not take your servant for a wicked woman; I have been praying here out of my great anguish and grief”(1 Samuel 1:12-15, NIV).